Parents

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Make (Good) Trouble is delighted to have been awarded a £10,000 donation from Sussex Police through the Police Property Act Fund (PPAF). This is made up of monies received by the police from property confiscated by order of the courts and then sold. Sussex Police has been hugely supportive of our work from the outset and this funding will help us to continue building on the success of our BBC Sussex and BBC Surrey radio series Raising Teens. The money will go towards the development of an online hub where parents and carers can feel included and supported with easy access to practical help and where they can gain a better understanding of teenage emotional and mental health issues.

The cheque was presented to Make (Good) Trouble’s teen reporter, Lola Ray by Chief Superintendent Jane Derrick.

L to R Jane Derrick, Jan Szaranek, Jane Keating, Lola Ray, Daisy Cresswell, Tayler Cresswell, Claire Kilroy
L to R Chief Superintendent Jane Derrick, Sergeant Jan Szaranek, Jane Keating, Lola Ray, Daisy Cresswell, Tayler Cresswell and PC Claire Kilroy

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Feedback on the latest series of our BBC Sussex radio show Raising Teens has been amazing and the feedback we love the most if from teens who have contributed to the show. This is from Gemma who talked movingly on Raising Teens about losing her mum, loneliness and grief. On her Instagram post, Gemma called it “a heartbreaking yet necessary conversation” about grief and loneliness.

“Raising teens is a platform dedicated to giving young people a voice, this in itself was one of the reasons I decided to get involved and share my story. When meeting Jane, Lola and Beren back in October, I was immediately struck by their passion to allow our voices to be heard, our opinions to be shared and our thoughts to be spoken about. 

“The topics we discussed were certainly not the easiest nor the most exciting. However, they were topics that are so universal, yet often set aside. I feel that the series has demonstrated how there are a number of young people out there, just like myself, wanting their story to be heard. As you can hear in a number of the episodes, there can be one topic but each individual’s take on it can be of complete, opposing ends of the spectrum – all dependent on their own experiences, yet this is what makes it so interesting.

“There is conversation out there waiting to be had and Raising teens appears to be the platform for that conversation to take place.

“When speaking up about my experiences surrounding grief and loneliness I felt vulnerable. Now I look back and see that through sharing my vulnerability i gained the strength to allow others to do the same. Thank you to all the #raisingteens Make (Good) Trouble team for allowing me to have this opportunity.”

We’d love to hear your thoughts on Raising Teens – please leave your feedback via our short survey here.

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Raising Teens’ series finale is a love letter to teenagers – a love letter to today’s adolescents and to the teen you once were – remember? That young person full of passion and energy – full of contrary anger and joie de vivre? That young man or woman in the making who will change the world? They are our driving force.

Our guests were neuroscientist and author Dean Burnett, vet, anatomist, reproductive biologist and author David Bainbridge and school learning and wellbeing mentor Debra Lloyd.

They talked about the fact that the teenager years are when you become who you really are. Perhaps the most important time in our lives.

🔊 Listen to Raising Teens: The return of the teenage brain

🔊 Listen to Lola’s interview with the Sussex Youth Cabinet

There’s a wealth of advice throughout the show, but here are our guests’ top tips for parents struggling to get through to their teen:

Debra

Listen to the Sussex Youth Cabinet’s top 10 tips for parents! And learn your new person that’s coming through the door – it’s not the child, it’s the teenager – and then find different ways to communicate with them.

David

Don’t try and struggle too much. Take a break. Give them some space, and just accept sometimes that they’re not listening to you any more!

Dean

Whatever’s happening, it’s not personal – they don’t hate what you’ve done, they don’t resent you personally. You are the parent and that’s just a generic factor in their life which they try and fight against. One tip is to try and communicate with them via someone else like a neutral third party because as a parent you’re far too close. When advice comes from a parent, it’s often seen as an attempt to control or limit autonomy which teenagers don’t react well to.

Help & Advice

Open For Parents – includes the East Sussex Youth Cabinet’s Top Ten Tips

Young Minds’ support for parents

The Mix, support for under 25s

Relate: Communicating with Teens

David Bainbridge’s book, Teenagers – A Natural History

Dean Burnett’s book, Why Your Parents Are Driving You Up the Wall and What to Do About It (read our review!)

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How do young people deal with loss? How can parents, who may be grieving themselves, help their teens to cope? Does grief affect teens differently? These are all issues covered in this week’s Raising Teens.

Our guests were Ross Cormack from Winston’s Wish, a charity giving help to grieving children, authors Mark Lemon and Martin Spinelli, and parent Helen.

🔊 Listen to Raising Teens: Grief

🔊 Hear Lola’s extended interview with a teen who has experienced grief

Our guests’ advice

Ross Cormack

Help them understand that what they’re going through is normal. Give them reassurance, listen, but don’t try to make it better. Be along side them.

Martin Spinelli

Listen and listen honestly. Engage honestly. You won’t have all the answers. It’s a process

Helen

Your teen might not want to talk, but you can just be there for them. And sometimes they will help you with your grief.

Mark Lemon

It doesn’t always have to be about words – remember the power of a hug. And honesty dispels a lot of anxiety.

Help & Advice

Winston’s Wish offers help and advice to grieving children with local drop-in sessions, online chat and email support 
Free national helpline: 0808 802 0021

Hope Again, the youth website of Cruse Bereavement Care
Free national helpline: 0808 808 1677 Monday to Friday, 9.30am to 5pm, or email hopeagain@cruse.org.uk

Martin Spinelli’s book, After the Crash, is “a handbook for dealing with disaster—not just surviving it but mastering it and using it to transform your life for the better.”

Listen to Mark Lemon’s brilliant podcast, Grief is my Superpower is designed to help young people and adults through grief. His books for children are at Lemondrop Books, in particular, The Magical Wood, which deals with grief: “a story about loss, friendship and hope”.